When Your Plan Stops Working

Welcome And The Core Question

SPEAKER_01 0:00

Hello, friends.

SPEAKER_00 0:01

Yes, hello friends. What's going on? Ma people. By the way, the other day when we were doing the workshop and you were like, hello, friends, I totally hear what Lisa was saying. Like I felt calm after you said that. Just the calmness about your voice.

SPEAKER_01 0:16

You know, there's two sides to me.

SPEAKER_00 0:18

There's two sides. There's the side that the public sees, which is the calm. And then there's a side that Mr. Mark sees. It's okay. I love both of them. I love them equally. All right, guys. Today we have a really powerful topic for you. One that I actually on purpose didn't discuss with Teresa. And I'm going to put her on the spot and just ask her to tell me what it means. I feel like this topic is something that people may be going through, maybe have experienced in the past, but they might actually be going through it right now. And it's one of those things where it can be super frustrating. And that is what to do when the plan you had originally intended is actually gone. And we're going to talk about this today. It may be a little difficult, maybe a little painful. I know some of our specific stories will be able to share some of that pain so that other people might be able to learn from it. But it's one of those things where we have to be willing to have these conversations if we want to make a change for ourselves, but also for other people in the world. And that's what we're going to do today. You ready to do that with me? Let's do it. You better, because you don't have any other choice. You got the microphone in front of you, Fred. All right, guys.

High Performers Hit The Plateau

SPEAKER_00 1:20

Well, welcome to Modern Leadership Coaching. I'm Mark.

SPEAKER_01 1:22

And I'm Teresa.

SPEAKER_00 1:22

This is where we help people uh really learn how to lead themselves and others effectively. And by the way, I feel like a lot of people have done this in the past, um, where you get really excited about something, you take action, you put together a plan, you're just excited about it. You're taking like you're getting results from it. And then something actually happens, something stalls, something comes up. Instead of adjusting your plan, making some tweaks to it, or really making an entire overhaul, we just keep doing it over and over and over again. And by the way, I want to make sure that we're calling out to our audience today. So, uh, and the reason why I say that is because we have high performers that are here, people who are like taking action. If you have a plan and you're not taking action, that's step one. Yes, that's something that we do. We actually help people with, but that's not necessarily what we're talking about. Because if you have a plan but you're not executing on it, there's really nothing that that's gonna tell you other than how do I get myself to execute on it? Find a coach, find somebody who can actually help impact you that way. But we're talking about the people who are like crushing it, taking action, getting results, and then plateau. And then they keep trying things and they keep working on it and they keep learning new skills and they keep making adjustments, and nothing changes, right? It's like, oh, this is so frustrating, right? I don't know about you guys, but I tend to try and outwork the problem at that point. Doesn't work. It doesn't work. Back in the day, I was like a uh, what was it, shingles and then my autoimmune. And it's like, hello, friend, like it's time to think about this differently. In reality, like I just kept trying to push. And that's really what I want to talk about today. So I know we have some questions to dive into, but you might actually already have something that's coming up for you. I don't know. You're looking at me like, can you stop talking so that I can give you my insights?

SPEAKER_01 3:06

But what was coming up for me? The the thing about just the plan overall, where like why even have a plan to begin with?

SPEAKER_00 3:14

Ooh, scary. Some people scary.

SPEAKER_01 3:16

Some people might be thinking that. So what do you say to those people?

SPEAKER_00 3:19

Yeah, like like you're going to go about your day. You're going to have time on this earth, you're going to put in action and energy into the things that you're doing. Um, you're going to end up somewhere. Why not actually take charge of where you end up? At least to some extent in terms of how we show up. You know, we talk about this a lot inside of HIMA, and that is like you actually can't control your results. We like to try and think that we can. We don't have control over that. We don't have control of the output. We have control over the input. How we show up, how we influence, we can 100% take control of that. When I think about putting together a plan, I don't necessarily put together a plan because I want the output, even though I love that that happens. I put together a plan because I know it'll cause the inside to grow faster and I'll get more input that I actually need and it'll help me show up in multiple different areas. So even if we're like, hey, I want to grow a business and I'm going to be able to retire. There's so many other things that I got out of this that even if we hadn't been able to do that, even if all we were like, ah, we have to stay in our jobs, I would have still loved all of the things and the person that I had become because of it. But everybody's like, oh no, but I have to do this specific thing, right? And so this whole idea of goals for me is like you're going to be going driving down a road. Why don't you think about where you want to end at the end of that road? Even if it's not something that you hit, you're going to become like so much more purposeful on the way there. You're going to grow through it as opposed to not. Like, obviously, setting goals isn't for everybody, by the way. If you're not somebody who wants to set goals, that's totally fine. You may not want to be listening to this podcast because we talk about that a lot. We talk about stretching yourself and growing. But like find your own community, find your own team that maybe doesn't want to focus on goals because that's fine, but that's not necessarily the way that we think about it.

SPEAKER_01 4:57

Yeah. And what I was thinking too is that, you know, have a plan so that you do know where you're going, but also be flexible in how that turns out.

SPEAKER_00 5:06

Yeah. It's what we're talking about today. Yeah. So let's talk about how that flexibility happens.

Plans As Input, Not Output

SPEAKER_01 5:10

Yeah. So what is the difference between like a plan changing and a plan just being over?

SPEAKER_00 5:14

Yeah. So maybe this is a good time to share our story, right? Or share the MLM story that we have. By the way, this is something that has happened multiple times, even in the health and fitness stuff that we have been focused on, right? Where you try something, it gets you to a certain level. And the way that I think about it, the perspective that I focus on is I had to become somebody different to be able to get to this level. In order to get to the next level, I have to take the person that I was before and build off that person. It's not like you're starting over. It's not like you're starting from scratch. All of that is totally BS. Anytime your brain tells you that, yell at it, tell it to shut up because it's actually not the truth. It's like, thank you, but I also do get to take all the stuff with me into my next thing. So, so when I think about the difference between like making a tweak versus it being over per se, it's like there's some things where we're going to keep tweaking, we're going to keep adjusting, we're going to keep trying to figure it out, right? But after a certain amount of time, you know, we teach this after a certain amount of time, if you're taking action and it's on the actual activities that move the needle the most, if you have a high energy state when you're taking those actions and you've given it enough time, it's trying to tell you something. It's trying to tell you something. And a lot of times it's telling you to pivot to make an adjustment, right? But sometimes it's telling you this is not something that's going to actually end the way you want it to. It's time to make a complete adjustment. And that for me takes me too long to understand that in my personal life. So with the uh MLM example.

Tweak Or End It Completely

SPEAKER_00 6:37

So some of you guys know I used to, I actually got started in personal growth and business related in the MLM space. It was the first space where I started to learn about growing, uh, about developing myself, um, about coaching, mentoring, those kind of things, right? And we spent about seven years, was it? About seven years doing that. And what I noticed is the first three years, like we were crushing it. And what I mean crushing it is like like we were rising up the ranks, we were helping a ton of people. I was getting on so many calls, it was amazing. And then at year three, we plateaued. And then we thought, you know what? Probably a new skill that we have to develop, a new thing that we have to develop, a new change of what we're doing. And so we tried a whole bunch of stuff, right? Which I'm so glad we did because we get to bring it with us into our clients. Anytime that we have a conversation with our client, we get to bring all these things that we did. But we invested. Um, I actually saw somebody, by the way, a little side note. I actually saw somebody this week who was like, you know what? Um, I get to bring all of the $50,000 that I spent on my personal growth to you by being your coach. And I'm like, $50,000, like when I think about our 13 years of growth, don't repeat. It is way, way, way, way more than that. And it's like it has to do with the value that we can bring people because we've gone through all of those different things. And it's not just about spending money. I don't want to say that either, but it's about doing it in a space where you can grow that you can now utilize for other people, right? But um, as we're going through this and as we're like pulling all of those lessons and stuff after three years plateauing, we kept hearing this thing, which was like, be here a year from now. Like I heard that over and over and over again. And and the philosophy is good if you are not the type of person that like goes all in. I don't know if people know this about me. I tend to go overboard when I say I'm gonna do something. I go all in and probably go all in for too long. And that's kind of what we did is um, and I say we, I mean me. Because I was like, okay, what do I have to keep doing? Uh I'm gonna keep showing up for this. I'm gonna keep showing up for my team. I'm gonna keep redeveloping myself. I'm gonna do, and I kept doing things that I kept actually becoming more and more and more valuable, but nothing was changing. And I'm like, what is going on here? Now, when I got to about year five or six, I started to think about like, is is was this like the thing that was important for me to get started to me for me to go down this path? But like it was just my stepping stone. It wasn't like my end goal. Like maybe this is the thing, right? But I kept convincing myself to stay, to stay, to stay, stay. I just needed a little bit more training. I just need a little bit more help. I need to be in a little bit different of a room. And nothing changed there. The crazy thing is, is that was the point that I actually like got really deep into coaching, where it was like not just mentoring, not using just MLM products, which is amazing if that's what you do, but like I started to become the resource instead of the thing that I was doing being the resource, and then me kind of like coming in on the back end and trying

The MLM Pivot And Betting On Self

SPEAKER_00 9:24

to help it. And what was crazy is I know I've I've shared this story before, is like once I got officially certified and then I went out and started to coach, within 42 days, I made the money back that we spent on the certification, which is like $20,000. And so in 42 days, I made as much money as we typically make, almost like in half of the year. And I was like, what in the world is going on? And that was the point that we decided to fully make that pivot because we were still doing some of the MLM stuff. We're like, you know what? If we had put this time and energy into this, what would it be like if we actually bet on ourselves? And and I don't want to say that like in a negative way because like a lot of people have companies and businesses and stuff that they pour into. It just wasn't the right thing for us. And I'm not saying that because I think other people shouldn't do it. I'm saying it because we found out for us it is not the right thing for us. Also, social media is not the right thing for us. We do podcasts and we do things like this because we like to really be able to help the people in front of us, right? I know for us coaches, one of the things that we do exceptionally well is when we're in front of people, when we're talking to people, whether in person, live, in a training, those kind of things, people really feel us. They feel our heart, they know that we can help them and we really make an impact in their life. And when I try to do that on social media, it just doesn't have the same effect. And so for us, like that stuff isn't things that have worked for us. But what has worked for us is adjusting, stopping the plans, saying, how could I not just pretend like none of this happened? How can I take all these things I've learned and move them into this next spot? And so, kind of like going back to your question, the difference between plan changing and being over is like you have to make that decision. It's not going to be somebody telling you that it's it. It's not going to be a coach saying, Hey, guess what? You need to stop that. Like, because nobody should have that level of influence in your life, to be honest with you. You have to decide what that is. A coach can help you, they can point out some things, they can like give you, ask you some questions, especially if you're if it's like you feels like you've been spinning over and over and over again. Maybe there isn't something that you have tried, but nobody can tell you that. You have to decide. And I remember like when I decided, first off, it felt so freeing. And then it felt scary AF because I didn't have a company to depend on. I was the one who was going out there, doing marketing, having conversations, helping people, telling them I'm a coach, asking them if they want my help, that kind of stuff, right? And I don't wanted this to just be about money, but how quickly we rebounded from that got us to be able to retire. We were never gonna be able to retire on our MLM income unless something else had drastically changed. Like we weren't gonna be able to do that. And that pivot was the thing that allowed us to retire. One of the things that I want to share today, because I remember when was it that we went to the retirement thing? You remember you and I went to that retirement event?

SPEAKER_01 12:09

Yeah. I don't remember when.

SPEAKER_00 12:11

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 12:12

Exactly.

SPEAKER_00 12:12

Yeah. So so I had a goal to retire from LAPD early. I had it very early on in the MLM business. I was like, I'm going to be able to figure out a way. And we were building it up and we were like like doing those kind of things. I was like, this is we're on track for this. I don't know if you know this, but being in Los Angeles, if you make $40,000 a year, I don't know how you can survive. We can't survive on that, right? Especially if you're not working and I'm not working. And I remember we went to a kind of like a retirement thing for LEPD put on. And they're like, okay, so here's what happens if you retire this year, here's what you retire at this age. And I remember leaving that place and we were walking out, and I'm like, well.

SPEAKER_01 12:48

Well, initially when we came in, we were excited because we had we didn't have all the information.

SPEAKER_00 12:55

Correct. Correct, correct. But I did have a goal, a vision of like us being able to both retire. But I remember when we left, we were like, okay, well, maybe I can just do it for 10 more years. Five, like, if we're really lucky, we'll do it in five years. And I remember that feeling that day because I was like, I don't know how long I can survive that long. Like literally, I have an autoimmune disease. Like I was in internal affairs. I had a lot of extra stress from work.

SPEAKER_01 13:20

You didn't think you were in internal affairs at that point?

SPEAKER_00 13:22

I think I was. I was. I think I was. Because it was the last six years that I spent over there in internal affairs. But it was like, it, it was like, man, it was kind of like a sucker punch at the moment, right? And you know me. I'm like, okay, we're gonna reframe it. We're gonna figure this out. Like, uh, we might have might might not be able to retire at this time, but like when I do retire in 10 years, like everything will be amazing, right? And so we still want to keep doing this. And it was at that time that we started to make some of these changes, which is really hard, like when we walk away from something. But I remember thinking about it in terms of not just the income we were making, but also the lives that we were impacting. And when people would message us saying, like, oh my gosh, I cannot believe this thing. And by the way, I experienced it that this weekend again, like with Natalie instead of Hima. Getting somebody to see and experience what it's like to have a coach, but then to learn this. That's that feeling that I had when I left the retirement lunching after after deciding that we're I'm gonna go all in with coaching instead. That was that feeling too, because I could feel the change that people were having. And it was not a program or product. It was me helping them see and learn something that they didn't know. And what's crazy is like that stuff, like this coaching has been things that have like been running under the surface for us like all of the time. When I think about like me being what, 49, you being not 49, like we are in, we are in excellent shape. We have amazing um connection with the kids. We have an amazing like relationship with me and you. We have this amazing business that we get to lead into. And I really think if like people were to watch us, we're not one of the type who like takes pictures and to puts all that stuff on social media. People would be like, that's what I want. And that's what we want to create for others. We want people to have their version of our life where we're in this space where we get to have these connections. And let me tell you, it's not all rainbows and unicorns either, right? But when I think about like what this has done for us and the impact that it's made, I'm like, we need to give this to as many humans as possible. And when I stepped into that energy, that's when I knew that the change was the right change for me to make. And I got to bring everything with me from that last level into this level. And I feel like we keep evolving from there. We keep evolving by by asking ourselves, okay, is it time to change the plan? Is it time for me to end this plan and move on to the next one? And I mean, I feel like as we're going and as we're growing, we're constantly like looking for these things and finding them as opportunities, but they're not easy. They're not easy to go through, which is why I wanted to have this conversation today. Because if you're feeling the inkling right now of like, maybe this is the same for me, please do not pretend like it's not there. Like if you this wasn't happening, it wouldn't be in your intuition. It wouldn't be coming up for you. You'd be like, no, like what I'm doing is amazing. Like, what are you talking about? Right. But if there's something that's coming up, it's because there's a reason. There's a reason. And it could just be the way you're thinking about it. It could be a reframe and that's amazing, but it could be there's something deeper. And like you've really got to look at this stuff, not just because we don't want to feel good all the time, but because if you really want what you want, if you really want to do something different, you have to not only take different actions, but you have to think differently. And these are the ways that we need to lean in and think.

Why It Feels Like Failure

SPEAKER_01 16:29

Yeah. It could be really hard for people to come to the realization that the plan needs to change or what they thought was going to pan out hasn't panned out. Yeah. So why do you think some people kind of keep managing that existing plan?

SPEAKER_00 16:46

It feels like failure. Um, because I can tell you exactly. When I was like, I'm no longer doing the MLM, all of these emotions flooded in. I'm letting down my team. I'm letting down the company. I'm letting this person down. I'm letting this. And it was literally like I told these people that I was all in. Now I'm lying to them. And it was like this thing that was holding me there for how many years? And it was because, like, oh man, I I feel like I'm failing. I failed them. And to be honest, like me failing, it doesn't feel like that bad of a deal. But if I fail, if I feel like I'm failing other people, which is a thought error, you can't fail other people. But if I feel like that's the case, man, that is like something that permeates through everything. And it was hard for me to get over that. It was hard for me to understand that that is actually that actually wasn't necessarily a quote unquote failure as long as I didn't quit everything, right? I was gonna utilize what it is, all of the skills that I learned into my next thing. Whether, by the way, whether it's business or not, I was talking to an amazing coach who is thinking about maybe not necessarily continuing to go all in with coaching. And it really is a hard conversation to have because you got to think about are you thinking about permanently like stopping coaching? Because if you are, you really need to think about at the end of your life, when everything's done, will you have felt like okay with this answer today? Because you just to do it to feel good right now is actually gonna hurt you in the long term. But if you're like, no, I don't want to do this, I want to utilize my connection with my family and just be on the next level. I'm like, okay, cool. Coaching is gonna help you with that. You already know this skill. Go ahead and fully like commit to it. And guess what? If you decide later to change your mind, that's totally fine too. It's not quitting, it's not quitting your family. It's not any of these stories that we make it like out to be. It's called being on a journey. You're on a journey. We don't know which direction it's gonna go, right? As long as you keep walking, as long as you keep taking the step, whether it looks like what everybody on Instagram says it's supposed to or not, is your step. And by the way, as your coach, I want to be along the ride as as many steps as possible. So even if the coaching is not your thing, I'm like, I still want to help, right? And so it's like being able to see that this is not a failure. This is actually a stepping stone. Like, what do what do you think that would look like if you stopped thinking of things as a failure and started looking at it as a stepping stone? That somebody else out there has an equal hard decision to make and they need to see you do it first.

SPEAKER_01 19:04

Yeah. So so if someone has that feeling that they're a failure if they don't go keep going along with this plan, what do you think that can cost

The Real Cost Of Spinning

SPEAKER_01 19:14

someone?

SPEAKER_00 19:14

Oof. Time, energy, frustration, money, all the above. Because what I found, not just with us, but like the clients that we actually help, is the spinning. The spinning, because you want something and you're so like dead set on it, but you're doing something, it will never give you that opportunity of getting it. And so it you're like spinning over and over and over and over again. And there's some toxic positivity that can be there. I just got to keep going. If I keep doing this, and I'm like, well, how long you've been doing this? Four years. Okay, don't keep doing it. Okay. We need to find a different pivot, an adjustment, something new to like we need to reinvent something here, right? The the marketplace, the world, God, maybe there's something out there that's kind of directing you in a different way, but you're like not being open to it. And you're trying to force this way, which is what I felt like I was doing, forcing the health and fitness coaching. When in reality, like health and fitness coaching was important for me, but it was a stepping stone. It was a stepping stone into the relationship coaching, which was a stepping stone into business coaching, which was a stepping stone into leadership coaching, which is now what we teach all of the above, right? Because we know how to do all of it. But it was important to go through all of those different phases, right? And by the way, as we're going, we had to make those adjustments, right? Relationships, most important thing to me, family, right? So I was like, let's do this, being a part of the dad edge, being able to coach people. But guess what? That also needed to be it needed to be evolved too. And like as I continue to evolve, now I'm more open to having these conversations, but it's still not any easier. Still not any easier. So, so the things that you give up are all the things that you want. Really. If you want more time, it's gonna take you more time. If you want more money, it's gonna cost you more money. Because like spinning around in circles, like obviously the the thing we can't get back is our time and our energy, but using our time and energy to spin around in circles is super frustrating. And so you've got to be willing to have this conversation with yourself. I would encourage you to find somebody else to have it with, by the way. Super hard to have it with yourself, or just Claude or just Chat GPT, because like they're just gonna get into the tactics and not what's actually going on. And they're gonna say, yeah, I think it's a good idea, or no, I don't think it's a good idea. And you don't want a computer steering where your brain goes, but I would highly encourage you to make sure you find somebody to be able to help you process it.

SPEAKER_01 21:20

Yeah, going back to what you talked about as far as positivity, kind of like that forced positivity. It's not that we're saying not to stay positive, right? Like if you're saying, Yeah, I don't give up, yeah, don't give up on yourself, but you can give up on ideas that don't work. Yeah, don't don't force those ideas that don't work. That's why, you know, these things are fluid, they can evolve and they can turn into other things. And that doesn't make you a failure.

SPEAKER_00 21:47

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 21:47

That just makes you a smart person.

SPEAKER_00 21:49

Yeah, yeah. So I haven't found this with a lot of our clients recently, but back when we were coaching more people in the MLM space, I remember having conversations with them. And I remember when they would come in and their goals were specifically tied to their MLM. Their goal was like, oh, I want to be able to help this many people with this and this many people with this. I'm like, that is too specific. You're not going to be open to the different ways that you actually could help people get there. And I remember challenging it and they were kind of pushing back. They were like, no, I want this. And I was like, well, how can we create a goal that is outside of how you're currently doing it, just in case there's another way to get there faster or, you know, that's actually going to come to fruition. And I remember them being like, okay, so I want to be able to make $100,000. I'm like, okay, now that we have the goal of $100,000, if you want to reverse engineer what it's going to take and number of people and all that kind of stuff, like we can do that. And I would love to do that for you. But remember, there's many different opportunities. And I remember somebody came back to me because they got hired as a coach for corporate and it totally like changed all of their goals that they had. They were like, I wanted to make $100,000 and I just got a job for $100,000 because now I get to coach using the skill that you taught me in the corporate setting and it's amazing, right? And by the way, there's two different times that I can think about that. Whereas like the person had a goal and they end up hitting it, not in any way that they thought it was going to. I mean, you know, there's that adage that the way that you planned it out to be is never the way that it ends, right? But you cannot do that if you tie your goals specifically to like this specific thing that you're doing. Just be a little bit more open with your goals, just because it'll open your mind to the different ways that you can go about and solve that goal and hit that, hit those goals and make the impact. And you're not like forced into one path versus the other.

SPEAKER_01 23:28

Yeah, I love that. So, what is the first thing that you would want somebody to do once they kind of figure this out that you know there's the plan just maybe needs to change

Process First, Then Decide

SPEAKER_01 23:39

for them.

SPEAKER_00 23:39

So uh they need to process it. They really need to think about it. Do do not take what we talked about today and just act on it. That is one of the worst things you can do because I'm really good at creating emotion in people. Like when you think about today's episode, you're probably going to feel uh something in your body. And that is what gets us to take action. But as your coach, I'm gonna tell you do not take action just in the moment because of how you feel. Process it. Think about it. Pros, cons. What are like some ways that this could be true? What are some ways that this couldn't be true? What are some other things that maybe I haven't tried? What could be some of the things that I tried that might give me a different result? Actually, take some time to process it. And yes, you can you can just brainstorm this on your own. I'd encourage you to find somebody. I keep saying that because it's super important to be able to find somebody who understands how the brain works and can help when it comes to guiding you through this, not telling you what to do. Do not look for somebody else to tell you what to do here. They're going to tell you their plan, which is gonna sound amazing and it's an incredible plan because it's their plan, but it's not your plan. That's why you got to find your plan. That's why we do coaching, not mentoring, right? And I'm very, very specific about this because like so many times people come to us and they have good intentions. They literally are like, this is the thing that worked for me. And I'm like, that's amazing, but I don't really care because it worked for you, because it's based off of your strengths, what you do, your past, your history, your things that you have going on. And it's gonna be something that I ponder and I think on, but I'm not gonna do it because you told me to, because it worked for you. I'm like, I'm gonna look at it through the lens of could this work for me? If it is, I'm gonna go all in and I'm gonna test it out for this amount of time and see how it like produces in terms of results. But also, there's a lot of things that I don't know that are happening behind the scenes. I don't know like the person's personality or what they've done in the past or anything like that. And they're not telling me any of that, right? Because they're so excited about this thing that they're doing. And by the way, you might notice this for you too. As a coach, you might think that your way is the only way. It is not. And I hate to break it to you, but I'm your friend. Okay. I want to tell you right now, your way is not the only way, but it is the way that you did it. It doesn't mean that you shouldn't go out and tell people about it. I would, but I would caution you to pretend like it's the one right, best only way to do anything. We coach a specific way. This is not a way for everybody. Not everybody is going to utilize our coaching. Some people just ask questions and they don't have a framework. Some people have a framework and they lean too much on it. Some people just do life coaching, some people just do performance. We found that beautiful synergy for us that's in the middle. And the people who join us, like when they say in the morning, like, good morning, my people, like those are our people. They're like all in. They're like, I want to do this. This is this is the right thing for me. And they're gonna be leaning in, they're gonna be testing it, they're gonna be trying it. But but it's there's so many different ways of coaching. And I'm not gonna talk trash or throw stones about anybody else's doing it because that's their way. That's their way that they have found. So, can you kind of tell I get in off a little bit on a tangent? But I'm a little excited. I'm a little excited this morning. But that's what I would say. Get somebody to do is like being able to sit down, to process it, to think it out, and then make a conscious decision, not based off of how you feel in the moment. The truth is about coaching, is you can cause yourself to feel however you want about any situation. Everything, everything, whether it's quote unquote good or quote unquote bad, you can think about it in a way that will get you motivated to do it. Don't just act on motivation. Actually think about it, process it, use some logic, and then do the conscious uh perspective creation that we teach, like really getting in there to ask those questions to really pull out some great emotions and then take action. But you've done it from a more of a logical standpoint, but also like related to how you tick.

SPEAKER_01 27:09

Yeah, I think that's a really great point. And I mean, we're even doing that now, um, kind of behind the scenes, where you know, we bring in our team to get some feedback. Yeah. So what this is our version of processing things, yeah. Where we think about it, we think about all of the different aspects of it, and then we go outside and ask our team, like, look at this. And what do you think? Yeah. What are some of the things that you spot that maybe we haven't spot? So Yep.

SPEAKER_00 27:34

I love it.

Detach From The Plan, Keep The Goal

SPEAKER_00 27:35

So what do you what do you notice when somebody is holding on to a plan for like dear life that is actually not there for them anymore? What do you notice?

SPEAKER_01 27:44

I notice, and this is from personal experience, but also from people that I've coached. There is this idea that you have kind of this vision or dream that you imagine. And it's hard to let go of those things. It's hard to let go of that that plan that you thought was gonna work out. And it does come from an emotional state, I I I believe, like like how you were saying. And it's it's more of like you don't want to let other people down or uh let yourself down, but you still have maybe you're too attached to the that idea or that dream or vision that it it just feels wrong to to give up on it or or even change it slightly. So I think that that's the main thing that I've noticed is just feeling that you're just kind of like giving up in a sense to this this vision that you had.

SPEAKER_00 28:43

Yeah. So here's what I want you to think about. I want you to be more attached to your goal than you're attached to your plan. Because when you think about your goal, I don't want you to change that. I want you to really be clear on your vision, what you want, why you want it, but I want you to be okay with how you get it. Like, yes, I want you to do the things that are right for you. Yes, I want you to do it by making it a powerful impact in the world. But I don't want you to be sold on the plan that you have in your mind in terms of getting there. That plan was only designed to get you to your next plan. To your next plan, and then to your next plan. I love that. And ultimately that's gonna help you reach your goals. So please lean into

Resources, Programs, And How To Reach Us

SPEAKER_00 29:25

that. All right, guys. Thank you for leaning in to today's episode. This has what we talked about today, it has a lot to do with leading yourself. And I know we have that five-part podcast series. If you're just new in this podcast and you haven't heard any of those, if you go to modernleadership.us forward slash lead, there's a five-part mini series on how to coach yourself and lead yourself through anything. Really, really powerful resource. We got a lot of feedback from that. And of course, if you need any help with this, we have multiple different ways to do that. I want to go over them real quick because I think a lot of people are confused by some of the things that we do. First off, we have a program called the Self Leadership Lab, which is all about leading and coaching yourself to your next level of success. It's a process that we take people through. Then we have the High Impact Mastery Academy. This is where we help teach people how to help themselves and others through anything that life is throwing you so you can still show up as your best self, take action, get the results you want, no matter how life is lifing. And then we have another program called the Master Coach Collective. We don't normally talk about this. This is for coach-trained people. It's more of like a mastermind for people who want to make sure that they continue to get coaching, to continue to be in an environment where they have that level of support, but also practice and continue to level up their skills. If you're somebody who's coach-trained, really any type of coach certification or program, or you just have a lot of coaching experience and you want to apply for that, you actually have to have a conversation with me to see if you're a good fit. We have that program as well. Multiple different ways. And if you're ever confused, you just reach out to me. Shoot me an email, like shoot me a message. I'm the type of person where I'm going to respond myself. I'm going to have a conversation with you. And if it's a good fit, awesome. If not, that's totally cool too. We're here to help. All right. All right, guys. Appreciate you so much. Look forward to seeing you guys next week. Go out and crush it and keep leading from the front. Bye, everybody.