Self-Leadership For Lasting Health

Bonus Series And Focus Areas

SPEAKER_01 0:00

Okay, guys, we're gonna do something a little special today. Today is Wednesday. Obviously, this is a bonus episode, but we're gonna do something special over the next two weeks. And what we're gonna be doing is we're gonna be doing episodes Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. Really focus on the areas where people want to make the most change. Okay. These are the areas of health. If you're trying to get healthy, you're trying to get whether it's physically, mentally, emotionally healthy, and you're struggling with that, right? You're trying to find ways of getting yourself to want to take action, creating more energy, doing all those kind of things, but you're like overloaded, busy, all those like whirlwind of life, we're gonna help you with that. If you're trying to create a deeper connection with your husband or with your wife, we're gonna be able to help you with that. If you're trying to get more connected with your kids to become the type of person that your kids are gonna bring stuff to because you've created a safe environment, we're gonna talk about that. If you're looking to grow your business, you're looking to find more clients, you're looking to expand your network so you can grow and do this maybe full time, whatever it is that you're doing. We're gonna talk about that. And then we're gonna talk about going through hard seasons in your life where something comes up, maybe a situation, a circumstance, a diagnosis, anything like that. We're gonna talk about how to get through that as well. So here's the thing. In every single episode, we're gonna expose that specific situation. We're gonna talk a little bit about the situation and what we have found causes people to be stuck in these areas.

Self-Leadership Lab And Real Execution

SPEAKER_01 1:20

Some of you guys have maybe have already heard over the email list and the podcast is we have a program that's called the Self-Leadership Lab. Okay. Inside of the program, we're gonna be teaching people how to figure out what are some of the things that are causing them to be stuck. We're gonna do a part of that here, though, on the show over the next five lessons. The main thing about the self-leadership lab is helping you to be able to execute on these things when it feels like you're getting punched in the face, when it feels like the real life is happening, when you feel like people are doing or saying things that maybe you don't want them to. Because the real work, yes, the awareness piece is important. And we're gonna help you do that a little bit here today on the health space. But like what's really important is being able to take that and execute on it. So if at any point any of these things hit home with you, any of these five different areas, even an area outside of this, that you want to be able to get some help, not only spotting what's keeping you stuck, but also being able to lean in and take full ownership of it and being able to lead yourself effectively through it, reach out to us and let us know because the self-leadership lab opens on July 6th and it actually closes on July 6th. So it's gonna be training that's gonna help people get to the not only the root of what's going on, but being able to lean and get the results they

Why Health Goals Feel So Hard

SPEAKER_01 2:27

want. So today we're gonna talk about this whole idea of health, right? So if you're somebody who, whether it's you're looking to lose weight, whether you're looking to have more energy, whether you're looking to eat healthier, whether you're looking to extend your life here on this planet, there's something that maybe is inside of you that is getting you to want to make these changes. But then we have the rest of the human experience, right? Which kind of like pushes against that experience. So I want to really talk about this in terms of what could be coming up in this situation. But before I do, how are you doing? I feel like I've just been talking all the time. Good. So where do you want to start in this one related to the health stuff?

SPEAKER_00 3:04

Oh, I think maybe what people think is holding them back. Because everybody has kind of a different story and different situations going on. And I think health is a really big deal, obviously. So what do you think people struggle with when it comes to this area?

SPEAKER_01 3:22

Yeah, because we are putting here the self-leadership lab, I've been having dozens and dozens of conversations with people who feel quote unquote stuck in multiple areas. One that comes up a lot is health because they see that I lost 100 pounds. I've kept it off now for like 13 years, right? And I'm still in the best shape of my life despite having the autoimmune ulcerative colitis that I have. And so people tend to go down this route a lot with me because they're like, oh my God, what did you do? Right. What did you do? They never asked me who I had to become in order to lose the weight and keep it off. And so I was actually on a call recently where somebody was talking about this.

The Trap Of One Right Way

SPEAKER_01 3:53

They're like, you know, what was really working is I was doing this workout, I was eating this kind of food. And in the past, like I was losing a little bit of weight and then I gained weight back and then I lose it again. And right now, when things are really crazy, it's really hard to get myself to take these actions. So, like, what are some actions that I can take in order to do this? Whenever I get into a conversation like that, I ask questions to figure out what's actually going on. What we don't realize is even if you're a coach and you understand this, there's going to be some service level things that your brain tells you as to why you're stuck. And I'd say 99.9% of the time, none of that has anything to do with actually what's causing you to be stuck. It's kind of like your brain is like, hey, if I focus over here and I get your attention over here, you won't actually have to attack this main problem, which is actually the main problem that's going on under the surface, right? And so I was having this conversation. One of the things came up with him, and I can see it a lot, especially if you're on social media. What's kind of funny is I'll tell you a story in a minute of somebody who like totally flipped their script. And I'm sure if she's listened to this, she'll agree with me with this. But when we think about losing weight or we think about getting healthy, if you have a mindset that is related to there is a right way to do this and a wrong way to do this, you have closed yourself off to the possibility of finding a solution for you.

SPEAKER_02 5:09

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 5:09

A lot of you guys know that GLP ones are like pretty big right now, right? And the online shaming that comes with some of the different things that people are doing. And I see this a lot. We are constantly in that environment where surrounded by other people's thoughts and we accidentally take them on as our own and we accidentally believe them, and then they prevent us from doing the thing that we know we need to do or could do to succeed. And so while I was having this conversation, it's like, well, I want to do it the old-fashioned way. I got to do it the hard way. I got to do it the right way. And I'm like, the right way? What does that even mean? Right. So many people have convinced themselves, yes, in health, but in so many other areas, that it has to be done this way. And what happens is your brain magically knows that it'll never succeed that way. You'll never succeed that way, which is a part of the plan. Because if it can convince you that you're broken, there's something wrong, this is never gonna work, you don't have to try. Your brain doesn't want you to expend any more energy, any more focus, anything. And so if it can convince you that you're just not good enough, this is just never gonna happen, literally you're letting yourself off the hook and you're taking zero ownership of actually what you can own, which is there is a way out there, I believe, for everybody. And it's going to look different for everybody. And if somebody else chooses another way, that doesn't make you a better human than them. And it also doesn't make you a worse human.

SPEAKER_02 6:27

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 6:28

It's like, do you want to lose weight or do you not? So I would be figuring out anything that I could possibly do in order to make that happen, right? Because I'm like, this is your health. You're going to put your longevity into the hands of somebody else who's like shaming people for doing this. I'm like, no, that is not the case. I mean, a lot of times, well, I I told you I was gonna tell you this. I follow this person and they were losing weight, quote unquote, the old-fashioned way, right? And you would hear them talk about it, and they were hearing how other people were doing GLP ones and they were kind of like poo-pooing it and using the shame and guilt game, and like, no, you've got to do this the right way, or you're gonna gain all your weight back. I'm like, well, actually, if you look at some of the statistics, some people have gained weight back. They do that with every program. They do that with the old fashioned way and also the new fashion way, if that is the way. There's been a lot of people who have seen success, more success than they've ever seen before, and it's improved their lives dramatically. And somebody else's belief could have prevented that. Like that kind of frustrates me a little bit. But what was funny is this person, now, if you look online, they're actually selling GLP ones. Now, I'm not gonna shame or guilt them because what they did is they became open to maybe this could be something that could help my clients. And then maybe it could be something that helps me as I get older. And then they started to use like microdosing and they were like, I feel so amazing. I'm bringing so much more energy to my family, I'm doing all this. And now they are legitimately saying, I was wrong. I was wrong to bring out that kind of like marketing, but now this is the thing that's right. I mean, and of course, if the person is quote unquote selling it, you can't.

SPEAKER_00 8:01

Yeah, I have to question their motives too.

SPEAKER_01 8:04

You could, but then also like think about the opposite too. Like, what if they really did believe in it and they really did think they're wrong? I would just choose to believe. Okay, like if it worked for them, they're gonna probably talk about it and want to sell it. I probably would do the same thing. But it's like these things. This is what I found so many times talking to clients. Which workouts should I do? Which exercises should I do? And in reality, they have this thought, like he had. There's a right way to lose weight and there's a wrong way to lose weight. And if I lose weight this wrong way, this is gonna mean something about me. That doesn't sound like it's a helpful thought. It sounds like that's more of a thought error. And when you're thinking that, it's gonna get you to do things that maybe you don't want to do, or it's just gonna get you to do nothing and then you're not gonna succeed. I'm curious, like if you were to do something like that, and let's say you were to lose 10 pounds over the next couple of weeks, how do you think that would motivate you? And he was like, I'd be unstoppable. I'm like, that sounds amazing. It sounds like that might be the path for you to go down. And here's the thing like, I don't tell people to go down paths, I just let them try it on for size. But these are the things, these are the things that happen related to health that could keep you stuck.

SPEAKER_00 9:08

Yeah. Yeah, and

When Other People Shape Your Body Story

SPEAKER_00 9:10

I was just thinking about my experience with health, and I started off losing weight and eventually like I got into the best shape of my life, and I got to a weight that was probably lower than I'm not gonna say that I should be. It was just like the way that I was eating, that I was exercising, I was doing really, really well. But my weight, like you could see it, I was pretty thin. And I would get comments about it. I would get comments about like, oh, you're losing too much weight or you're super thin, your skin and bones, blah, blah, blah. I even got one once where it says, why don't you just eat a hamburger? And it's funny now, but back then it was like it was really hurtful because I thought my body's just doing what it's supposed to do. I was feeling really great. I wasn't doing anything drastic. I was just letting my body just be and doing what it needed to do. And if it was getting me to a a lower weight, then okay, that's what my body is gonna do. But I started to kind of see those opinions of other people as something that I was doing wrong. And I started to change my thoughts about my current situation. I started thinking, well, maybe I need to put on some weight. Maybe I I need to change my diet a little bit so that I can gain some weight so that I don't get those comments anymore. I wasn't really thinking that specifically, but that's truly what it was. It was like I was taking other people's opinions and their thoughts. It didn't mean anything about me. It meant them, right? But I didn't understand that back then. And I was taking all of that and I was internalizing it and thinking that there was something wrong with what I was doing when in reality I was doing what was making me feel good.

Beliefs That Hold Under Pressure

SPEAKER_00 11:03

Yeah. So Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 11:04

Thank you for sharing that. Thank you for sharing that. I was on a slightly different angle, but very similar to what you just shared. I was on a call with a client talking about this. So for some people, it's like the people you hang around, right? And it's very easy to start taking on their thoughts, beliefs, and actions, right? We don't think you have control, which is why like this whole idea of self-coaching and self-leadership is so important because it's not just when you're listening to a podcast that you need to retrain your thoughts. It's in those moments when you're in that environment to go, yeah, thank you for that. But return to sender and it doesn't need to be in my brain at all. But I was talking to a client about this because I know a lot of people in the space of health and fitness, sometimes it's like a time or energy or that kind of stuff in terms of they're not able to succeed that way, or because they're big boned or their family is, you know, grown up like just that way. It's just who they are, right? And one of the things I was talking to my client about yesterday, and it kind of came up was back when I was working LAPD and I had a lot of extra weight, I had those two things. And yes, like I just got married. Now I had a lot of strong belief around I couldn't lose the weight. I couldn't do that. Like it just wasn't possible. I just had all of these things. Fast forward, like 10 years from there, I'm working as a sergeant now for LAPD. We have a multiple six-figure online business. I've created the certification with Josh. I have two kids, two littles, uh, trying to connect with you on a deeper level, being a part of multiple masterminds and losing a hundred pounds and keeping it off. Think about that. I had the same time, same exact situations. Sorry, last time. I just chose to go in and grab the beliefs that actually would help serve me. And I learned how to do what we talk about all the time being able to not just coach myself through the easy times, but especially coach myself during the hard times. Cause I gotta say, when you're able to do that, nothing can stop you. Because you're gonna find a way. Yeah. It's just a matter of, I'm gonna find a way.

Reframe Your Story And Next Steps

SPEAKER_01 12:53

And that's what I want you guys to grab onto today. So today we talked about health. I want you to think about what is the story I've been telling myself that is actually preventing me from getting the results that I want. That if I just removed that story, if I reframed it, if I thought about why this is so important and meaningful to me, they would have literally opened up the doors for you having the success you want, for keeping it, and then maybe being able to inspire some other people through it too, right? I'd love to hear what that would actually look like. And of course, if you need some help implementing it, that is what we're teaching inside of the self-leadership lab. Not just how to listen to a podcast and feel good, but in the moment, get yourself to not be open to everybody else's thoughts, opinions, and feelings unless it's actually going to serve you and instead finding your own. All right, guys. Thank you guys for making it to the end of this first episode. Next, we're actually diving into business and income. How can you find more clients? If you're struggling with that, definitely tune in on Friday. All right, everybody. Have a great week and I'll see you soon.

SPEAKER_00 13:51

Bye.