Achieving Fitness Goals and Entrepreneurial Freedom

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0:43 What is going on, my people? Welcome back to another episode of the Modern Leadership Podcast with your host Teresa. You said my name again. Oh, and your co-host, mark. Hey everybody. So we have a really great question today. By the way, don't forget we are answering your questions. If you go into whatever podcast app you have, there's a little button there that says send us a text message. It sends Buzzsprout a text message through us for us, and then we're able to grab onto it and we're able to answer it for you. If you're inside of our app because you're a part of our book club or anything that we have that we offer, you get free access into the app. You can definitely go in there and share your question as well. Now today we have somebody calling in all the way from New York City.

1:25 I don't know where that came from, but they said can you share your health journey with us and how you were able to get into better shape after trying for so long? So I want to share mine, but I also want to share yours first. So can you share? Do you want to share mine? I, yeah, why not? This is a behind the scenes stuff. So can you share, maybe, a little bit about your journey and what it was that you think helped you after trying to get into shape for so long? Yeah, I think, so we don't make this super long Just identifying, like, what was actually hindering me from actually losing weight or feeling better. So I found out that I had PCOS and I think this was back in, I think, like 2008,.

2:11 That was when they actually diagnosed me with PCOS. So you know, I had a little bit more of a challenge to be able to, you know, lose weight and just feel good overall. But truly where my journey started was after our second child was born, so maybe like two years after that started to feel really groggy, really like just blah, because I was working full time as well. So I wanted to I would say I wanted to lose the baby weight because I still was carrying that around. How much was that? So I think in total I lost 30 pounds, not that I was 30 pounds overweight, but I don't know.

2:59 I guess my body just kind of like shed the weight and what ended up happening was because I was like really inconsistent with focusing on exercise and nutrition. Once I did get to do that, once I committed to exercising regularly and, you know, focusing more on the food that I eat, then that's what started to really help me lose the weight. I don't remember how long it took me to do that. I think it was in like 10 pound increments for a while. Maybe it took me a year. But what I really learned about myself was that I really had more control than I thought I did.

3:47 When I got diagnosed I thought, well, you know, it is what it is. I was like, you know, I might not be able to lose weight and you know, times also change, right, as you get older, you start getting other symptoms and it does get a little bit more difficult. But for me I just learned that what I put in my body really mattered and how much I really cared for myself in the form of exercise really mattered. So I am more, you know, disciplined, and I mean not disciplined. I think it's more of a habit just to do exercise now, right, like I'm more active and I really kind of stay committed to that because I just feel good. I may need a little bit more help with nutrition lately, but that's kind of how it started for me or how it went for me.

4:37 It's the red velvet cupcakes. Yeah, I always get those for her too, I'm like oh, do you want a treat from the store? Yes, I want to ask you do you want a treat from the? store. Yes, I want to ask you a few more follow-up questions because I know people will have some questions about this, but I also want to bring out a couple different things. First off, I'm super proud of you because, like obviously you know, because we just got back, so we've been doing like 5Ks. You went from I remember the first day I went to the gym with you and you walked on. I think it might've been the elliptical, I thought it was actual treadmill. No, I think it was a treadmill. Okay, and you put your hands on the sensors that tell you what your heart rate is and you were walking and it was like 190. However, I was talking to you about something that happened at work, so I was like already I don't know.

5:21 But like every time that we tried to work out together, I would look over and I would be like, oh my God, we need to stop working out because she's walking and she's like her heart's about to go into like convulsions, right, and you went from that. You went from that to being able to run a 5K. By the way, you didn't tell people what program did you start off with when it comes to like working out gym membership for three years, and you went three times. Yeah. In a total of three years. Right, and then they don't know Like what. What did you do? Uh, P90X. Okay. So she went from not going to the gym like walking to the treadmill three times 190, like hard work, it seems like it to Mark deciding, hey, I want to try this program called P90X.

6:02 And she's like I'll do it. I'm like, no, I didn't say it, like let's be real. Okay, but regardless, you did, you showed up, and then after that we did Insanity, and then after that we did more, and it was like this, this thing where you did something that was like one of the most hardest programs in the world back then, but yet you did it and you crushed it, right, and you just found ways of being able to excel that. So super proud of you for doing that. Now I guess what a lot of people think probably are wondering is like how did you go from that where you went, you know, to the gym three times in three years to now six days a week working out for an hour, hour and a half on yoga, by the way, yoga day sucked, that was like 90 something minutes right To doing that, to eating healthier, and not only just doing it, but it kind of felt like it was a switch, where it was like being super inconsistent, and then this one thing happened and then all of a sudden you're like misconsistent.

6:57 So tell us about, like, what actually happened. Yeah, definitely wasn't a switch. It was just, I think the the fact that I showed up consistently for like a period of time was enough for me to be like oh, I can actually do this. What if I keep doing it Right? And I mean it's. I mean I still have days where I'm like I don't want to work out Right. So there's always those thoughts that come up and you know, when people think like, oh, like, people are just super disciplined and they, they want to do it. I mean, some people may want to do that, but I think it's just when I focus on those habits, the habits that I was struggling with and as I showed myself and I, you know, at the beginning I really pushed myself.

7:45 So there was like a lot of like the mental game and just being more disciplined that definitely had to kick in for me to show myself that I could do it Right, because you know, I thought like I couldn't Right, I put up a story today because, you know, we did do that 5K and it's like now the 5Ks are like oh, yeah, let's just do a 5K. And before it was like oh, we have to really work up to a 5K, like we have to, you know, really plan it out and do a lot of running to get to that point and it's just like you just keep, you know, like passing these milestones and something that seems so challenging now, later on it's going to be like oh, I did that, so let me let me, you know, put the bar up a little bit higher and I lost my train of thought.

8:36 What was I talking about? You were talking. No, you, you actually answered that question beautifully. But one of the things that that, like I was thinking about too, is before that. I kind of felt like I was pushing you to go to the gym and to do things and you were like, nope, peace out. But like the, the P90X incident, like it wasn't a hey, you have to do this, it was an incident. It was just more like hey, I'm going to do this, like if you'd like to do it with me, that'd be awesome, kind of thing, right, and? And you were like okay, and then you just jumped into doing it. Right, and it wasn't more of me talking about you eating certain foods or me talking about your workouts and stuff like that. I feel like there was a little transition from me into like being your husband rather than being your life coach, or not life coach, but your fitness coach, which you didn't sign up for, right.

9:22 And it's one of those things where, instead of me trying to convince you to do it or anything like that, it was more of just like hey, this is an opportunity if you'd like to do it with me, kind of thing. So I don't know, what do you think about that? Yeah, it definitely seemed less of a push and I mean you're it's part of your personality like not being pushy, but like you're assertive and you're like, hey, let's do this because you get excited about things. Um, but it doesn't always translate to me About this podcast. No, I hear you, I hear you, I hear you, okay, so, um, all right, so let's, let's change gears. I'll I'll talk a little bit of the mind, but, but I'll talk a little bit about my transformation.

10:04 But, like, I feel like our transformations are like intertwined, right, I feel like we were going through and at the exact point is when we both like trends, like decided, yeah, we made a decision, right. Yeah, and I think that just a little side note. I think that really helped as well, because trying to do it by myself wasn't working and that's kind of like what we were doing at the beginning, where you know you would go to the gym and it's like I would stay home with the kids. You know, when you had the day off or hey, you know you stay home with the kids so that I could go to the gym. So it was kind of like we found something that worked for us and then we did it together. Huge help. Yeah, 100%, 100%. I mean, um, when I think about where I was so, so, um, I was really heavy into sports when I was a kid and then, um, after high school, college happened and so did all the video games games like I was talking about last time, and so did me, working night shift at Universal Studios as like the security watch commander, and so I was working late at night, I was going to school during the day and then I was any other time that I had available I was playing video games, and so I live right next door to McDonald's.

11:09 I remember I used to go across. I would get two Big Macs, because it was two Big Macs for $2. And I would get a Big Macs because it was two Big Macs for two dollars, and I would get a nine piece chicken, mcnugget and a large fry I mean large fry, large, uh coke, um, and fries. Yes, I had to have the fries, but I would do that sometimes twice a day, uh, because I was like that's the fastest way that I can do it and get back to playing my video games, doing the things that I want to do watching football, fantasy football, all those kind of things, and it was very quickly. I gained weight and I was a hundred pounds overweight. Um, I remember, um that, that when I met you, that was kind of like a way of me losing weight, because I was so like nervous that I just wasn't hungry. And I did lose a little bit of weight then. But while I was doing that, I, I I knew that I wanted to be an LAPD officer, right, and you can't be an LAPD officer when you are a certain weight and I remember looking like you had to be a certain percentage I forget what body fat percentage it was, but I was way over it, and so I was like I'm going to do whatever I can to make this dream happen, right, and so I started to lose weight, very unhealthy, in a very unhealthy way.

12:11 I would work out in the gym for like an hour and a half to two hours, I would like play racquetball, and then I'd go on a run, and I would do all this on an empty stomach and I was eating very little. And so what's crazy though is is you'd think I'd lose a lot of weight, and I did start to lose weight, but then it stopped and I'm like what? So how do you eat less and how do you work out 20, 30 pounds, 20, 30 pounds. And if you look at some of the pictures, some people look at me, at those before and after pictures and they're like who is this person? That is not you, right? But I remember that person. I remember not being able to see my feet because my stomach was out and it would like hover my feet, so I couldn't see my feet and I remember that like very vividly and I honestly don.

13:00 But anyway, when I got to that point, I did start going to the gym, I did start eating a little bit better, starting to figure out about supplements and things like that, but it was me going to the gym and it was the same thing, like I lost a little bit of weight but I was up and down and up and down. And that's when, you know, this whole idea of P90X came up right. So a lot of people know this. But we were Beachbody coaches right, because when we first found that and we first found out like some of the different supplements and stuff that they had, it kind of like it gave us the mixture of both the fitness, the nutrition and the accountability from our coach at the time. Right and by being able to do that. Being in that environment, I remember actually laying in bed going, hey, I think I'm going to purchase P90X by the way, it was off of eBay.

13:43 I'm like I'm gonna buy it from ebay, not from the actual company, but I'm gonna buy it from ebay, um. And so theresa was like, um, okay, and so I ended up buying it. We ended up starting working on at home. It was very sweaty, very messy, very like, uh, like I don't know how we're gonna be able to do this. We had to get a pull-up bar and had that, the pull-up bar, in the doorframe, and we had to upgrade that to an actual pull-up bar. Remember that I think it would fall all the time and it created a lot of damage to the doorframe. Needless to say, we did it, we crushed it right, and then we're like, hey, what's next? And of the business, because it helped us.

14:24 And I think what ultimately helped me stay consistent was the personal development and mindset work that I did, because, if not, I would have gotten tired of doing peanut X over and over again. Right, I would have gotten tired of the way that we were eating. I wasn't getting tired of the way that I was feeling, but I needed to develop and become the type of person who did that stuff automatically not whether or not I was excited by it, right and so for me, it was the, it was the whole journey into personal growth. It's it's the reason why we have moderate leadership the way that we have it right now, and that is we do like videos related to a specific book that like transformed our life, because there's like literally 90 books that transformed and and helped us not only like make adjustments, but also lean into things we had learned before, but hearing it in a different way, so that we can, you know, lean into that to get ourselves to take action and then using that not only in business but in health and with relationships, like it just helped us develop more and more and more.

15:19 And what's funny is like whenever I tell people I had a hundred pound weight loss, they always want to know what workouts I did right. They never want to ask me or they never asked me who I had to become to lose the weight right. Because I became the type of person who works out like this, who drinks water, who goes on, you know, extra walks, who, you know, gets the movement in and the exercise and brings the kids along and eats healthier and those kinds of things. Because you have to develop some skills and develop and do take the actions enough for it to become habit. And when you have those skills and those habits, then you're just, you become that type of person who does it and then you have to worry about, like, what happens when you get there. Right, Because if you're always on a journey to get somewhere and you're not like learning the skills you need to learn, you're going to get there and then you're going to gain it back, right, which is why I never had to lose that hundred pounds again.

16:05 It's like it's been that thing where you know I'll go up and down five or 10 pounds max and and that's just a part of like who I am right now it's just like five or 10 pounds, but it's not something like I had to revisit and lose that a hundred pounds again. Right, because it's the person that became in the process. Yeah, it's just a different mentality and I remember, like my Trina thought from the earlier conversation, but you know, I wrote in my story like I'm not going to say that I'm not a runner anymore. I am a runner and I had a screenshot of just like the progress that I've made and that is how it is. In each step of the journey. It's like you can't tell yourself that you can't do something because you're just going to go out and prove it.

16:49 You have to tell yourself that you are learning, you're becoming you're, you know you're pushing towards whatever it is that you want to do, and then you start acting like that person today, Right, even if it's like you know a really small habit. It's like you just start believing that that's the path that you're going to take and that's who you're going to become. Yeah, that is so important. And what you just said right there that's something that we do as coaches, right Is some people think they have to go from like I'm not this to I am this right, and that is not going to be helpful if you don't believe it, right, it's like saying that you're a lion, right. It's like you're not a lion, right, but you can go from like I'm not a runner to I'm learning to enjoy running or something that's like a stepping stone up to I am a runner, right.

17:39 Or and this is yeah with running, but it can also be with like confidence, right, as like I'm going from like I don't have any confidence to I'm the most confident person in the world, right, it's like I'm learning how to develop my confidence. I'm learning to lean into, like my intuition and to take those kinds of actions and to know that I can feel forward, like when you do that, it's a stepping stone and it ultimately get you to transform the way you show up, right? So that's why, as coaches, when we say that we're life and performance coaches, that's the reason why is because we focus a lot on what the stories are that we're telling ourselves to get ourselves to take action. And so when somebody says, what was it that really changed, that actually helped you to act, to be able to show up and to take action to lose that weight?

18:20 It was the stories we were telling ourselves. Because when we are telling ourselves that story, whatever that story is for you, it got us to show up, to take action, knowing that only two possibilities can happen, right. Number one, we could do it the right way and actually lose weight. Or number two is, we could actually learn from it. Right, and we can grow from it. We can figure out what we do differently next time. And when you take that approach, you can really successfully, yes, lose weight. But in any situation that you're going through, as long as you are able to, like, get that belief under control, you can go out there and you can crush it and you can take the actions that you need to take and show up the way that you want to, and then you can reap the rewards for the rest of your life. It's one of those things that, like, I think about, like we did those hard things, not just with our health but also with our business, right, we put in all of that action energy I know we were sharing on an inner circle call like how many trainings and mentorships and one-on-ones and coaching programs we went through and courses that we went through, and some people were like, oh my gosh, you guys went through all those and it was like, yes, we spent seven years of like literally pouring into our business without actually being able to take a lot of money out of our business and because of that, now we get to retire, you know, from the police department.

19:29 You don't have to go to UCLA anymore and we get to work from home, right? I know I look over you all the time and I'm like can you believe today's Monday? We're like literally sitting here just recording a podcast and asking ourselves, like, what do we want to do for lunch? Yet we're actually getting paid more than I've ever gotten paid in my police career because we were willing to put in that action and that energy, right. So we're just telling you this to inspire you to go out and get it, because this is literally what I really believe that you're put here on this planet for a reason not only to make an impact and to really help other people, but also so that you can live the life that you truly deserve, and that's what we're doing here in our business right, and being able to do that means there's gonna be some hard things that are gonna have to be tackled through personal growth, through really like leaning in and having those hard conversations and figuring out like new strategies, new ways of thinking to get you to show up the way that you wanna show up.

20:18 So I didn't think the podcast was gonna take that transition, but it really truly is. So instead of asking like how long is it going to take or what do I need to do, I want you to ask yourself who do I need to become and what story do I need to tell myself to get myself to be there? All right, guys, appreciate you so much. Love to hear some feedback from this episode too and, of course, if you have any questions, don't hesitate to reach out, hit us up. Thank you for what you do out there every single day.