March 2, 2026

Why Most Coaches Confuse Excuses with Explanations

Send a text What if the “smart” reasons you give yourself are the very thing keeping you stuck? We peel back the layers on excuses vs explanations and show how fear often hides behind logic that sounds responsible: I need more clients before I invest, I need more confidence before I sell, I don’t know what to say. These lines feel true because our brains are built to keep us safe, not bold. Once you see the pattern, you can choose movement over waiting. We share how we coach coaches through ...

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Send a text

What if the “smart” reasons you give yourself are the very thing keeping you stuck? We peel back the layers on excuses vs explanations and show how fear often hides behind logic that sounds responsible: I need more clients before I invest, I need more confidence before I sell, I don’t know what to say. These lines feel true because our brains are built to keep us safe, not bold. Once you see the pattern, you can choose movement over waiting.

We share how we coach coaches through this trap without shaming, pushing, or playing guru. Empathy matters, but empathy without leadership enables the stall. You’ll hear the exact shifts we make: reflect the story, name the cost of delay, and ask braver questions that turn insight into motion. We discuss why confidence never arrives on the front end, how action creates clarity, and how to design tiny experiments that reduce risk while building real momentum. From first sales conversations to low-stakes pilots, we map out steps that help you learn faster than your fear.

Expect practical prompts you can use today, for yourself and your clients. Try the pause: when you hear “I just need…,” ask, Is this helping me move or helping me wait? If it’s the latter, shrink the next step until it’s doable now, act, and debrief. This is how you build earned confidence, deepen client results, and lead with integrity. If this resonates, follow the show, share it with a coach who needs a nudge, and leave a review—tell us the explanation you’re ready to retire and the action you’ll take next.

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Chapters

00:00 - Why Excuses vs Explanations Matter

00:22 - Meet Mark And The Mission

00:50 - Common Stories Coaches Tell Themselves

01:28 - The Trap Of Reasonable Explanations

02:12 - Empathy Without Enabling

03:05 - Readiness Is Built By Doing

03:45 - From Protection To Power

04:16 - The Pause That Creates Movement

Transcript
WEBVTT

00:00:00.080 --> 00:00:03.759
So what's the real difference between excuses and explanations?

00:00:03.919 --> 00:00:05.519
And why is this even important?

00:00:05.759 --> 00:00:06.639
Well, thanks for asking.

00:00:06.799 --> 00:00:10.800
So if you're a watcher of this channel, you may notice that both the brains and the beauty is not here.

00:00:10.960 --> 00:00:12.720
Don't worry, my wife will be back next week.

00:00:12.880 --> 00:00:14.240
But you're kind of stuck with me today.

00:00:14.320 --> 00:00:18.000
And the reason why is because today's topic is so important, it actually couldn't wait.

00:00:18.160 --> 00:00:22.640
Now we're gonna get to in a minute like how this actually helps when you understand the difference for your clients.

00:00:22.800 --> 00:00:26.879
But first, like anything we do here at Modern Leadership Coaching, we need to start with ourselves.

00:00:27.039 --> 00:00:28.960
Now, for those of you guys who don't know me, my name is Mark.

00:00:29.120 --> 00:00:30.640
I've been a coach for about 13 years.

00:00:30.879 --> 00:00:36.880
Me and my wife Teresa created the High Impact Mastery Academy because we want to teach people how to get to the root of what's actually holding them back.

00:00:37.039 --> 00:00:43.039
Because the truth is the world does not need more coaches, it needs more people who can be trusted with this level of influence.

00:00:43.200 --> 00:00:44.159
And that's you, my friend.

00:00:44.320 --> 00:00:46.399
Or otherwise, why would you even click on a video like this?

00:00:46.560 --> 00:00:50.719
So let me share this really quick from our perspective, since we are the coaches of coaches.

00:00:50.880 --> 00:00:52.560
Here's some of the things we hear all the time.

00:00:52.719 --> 00:00:54.880
I need more clients before I can take the next step.

00:00:55.039 --> 00:00:57.280
I can't invest anymore until I make some more money.

00:00:57.439 --> 00:01:00.159
I don't feel confident pitching or selling my services yet.

00:01:00.320 --> 00:01:01.759
I don't even know what to say.

00:01:01.920 --> 00:01:02.799
I'm stuck.

00:01:02.960 --> 00:01:04.480
And I don't know why.

00:01:04.719 --> 00:01:06.799
Now, as a coach, I want you to zoom out for a second.

00:01:06.959 --> 00:01:08.000
This is very common.

00:01:08.159 --> 00:01:15.200
I know you already understand this, but a lot of what holds people back is not technical solutions, all the steps they need to take, or getting advice.

00:01:15.359 --> 00:01:18.319
It's these internal stories our clients tell themselves that keep them stuck.

00:01:18.480 --> 00:01:19.200
Well, guess what?

00:01:19.359 --> 00:01:20.799
The same is true for us.

00:01:21.040 --> 00:01:28.400
As a matter of fact, I find that they can hold us back even more because we understand what's going on and we can actually use that against us.

00:01:28.560 --> 00:01:30.640
That's why this video is so important today.

00:01:30.799 --> 00:01:34.239
Now, going back to some of those statements, they actually sound pretty reasonable.

00:01:34.400 --> 00:01:35.760
Like you're being responsible.

00:01:35.920 --> 00:01:39.680
I'm not going to take this next step until I find more clients or I make more money.

00:01:39.920 --> 00:01:42.959
But why do so many good and thoughtful coaches end right here?

00:01:43.200 --> 00:01:46.319
The truth is, is because it feels so real.

00:01:46.560 --> 00:01:52.319
And because it feels real, we actually think of this as our reality, the facts, the actual truth.

00:01:52.480 --> 00:01:55.359
Now I know we actually help people identify this.

00:01:55.519 --> 00:01:57.439
So why do we get ourselves stuck too?

00:01:57.680 --> 00:01:59.599
Because we have a human brain.

00:01:59.840 --> 00:02:01.040
It's supposed to work that way.

00:02:01.200 --> 00:02:07.439
But when we understand the difference between excuses and explanations, which you're going to learn today, that's when the light bulb really comes on.

00:02:07.599 --> 00:02:10.000
So stay with me because there's nothing wrong with you.

00:02:10.159 --> 00:02:12.639
We just need to do some extra upgrades to your operating system.

00:02:12.879 --> 00:02:17.120
Now, at some point, we realize something subtle but actually important.

00:02:17.360 --> 00:02:19.599
And that's that a lot of our clients aren't lying.

00:02:19.759 --> 00:02:22.719
They're just confusing explanations with excuses.

00:02:22.879 --> 00:02:24.240
And the same is true for us.

00:02:24.400 --> 00:02:31.120
Now, when we hear it, one of the ways that I see coaches respond in this situation actually hurts their client more than helps them.

00:02:31.280 --> 00:02:33.439
And that's because they want to be compassionate.

00:02:33.599 --> 00:02:35.520
They want to feel what their client feels.

00:02:35.680 --> 00:02:38.879
They don't want to pressure them to think or do anything different.

00:02:39.039 --> 00:02:43.039
And they want to make sure that the other person really understands that they know where they're coming from.

00:02:43.199 --> 00:02:51.360
Now, I understand there's a place in coaching for empathy, but the most important thing is to really step up as a leader when people need you most.

00:02:51.599 --> 00:02:56.080
Now, I don't mean shaming or guilting or trying to pressure or force somebody to take action.

00:02:56.319 --> 00:02:58.479
That's a different kind of coaching, and we don't do that here.

00:02:58.639 --> 00:03:07.120
I mean meeting your client where they're at, getting to give them some space, but also not getting power to their excuses because you believe in them more.

00:03:07.439 --> 00:03:13.280
Now, here's the truth is I think there's actually a harder question to answer than simply, is this an excuse?

00:03:13.439 --> 00:03:18.560
And that's what happens to a human who keeps waiting to feel ready before acting.

00:03:18.800 --> 00:03:19.439
Ouch.

00:03:19.599 --> 00:03:26.879
I know these are difficult conversations, but ones that can change your trajectory and definitely your clients forever.

00:03:27.120 --> 00:03:27.919
You know this.

00:03:28.080 --> 00:03:29.759
Confidence doesn't come on its own.

00:03:29.919 --> 00:03:33.840
It doesn't come from thinking, simply preparing, or even knowing.

00:03:34.080 --> 00:03:39.919
It comes from doing, learning, getting some feedback, and going out there and trying it again.

00:03:40.080 --> 00:03:51.360
And anytime we try to postpone it, whether we use things related to money or time or energy, when we truly know that's what we want, we're actually just delaying the inevitable.

00:03:51.520 --> 00:03:58.319
Now I want to remind you, not only for your clients, but for yourself, this is not about forcing someone to do something they don't want to do.

00:03:58.560 --> 00:04:00.639
This definitely isn't about selling harder.

00:04:00.800 --> 00:04:05.039
It's about noticing what your explanations are trying to protect you from.

00:04:05.199 --> 00:04:16.079
Because if you really want it, and I truly do believe that you do, having this conversation so that you can open your eyes and see what is actually holding you back will give you more power than you can imagine.

00:04:16.240 --> 00:04:19.600
And honestly, it's what the world needs now more than ever.

00:04:19.759 --> 00:04:29.519
So the next time you hear yourself say, I just need, I want you to pause and then ask yourself is this helping me move or is it helping me wait?